Monday, October 31, 2011

oh god, it's EVERYWHERE

In an effort to catalog my every achievement of Maternal Awesomeness, I give you this:

The day was saturday.  The time was just before 9am.  Grace, Katie and I were playing in Gracie's room.  Katie started to fuss, so I told Gracie I was putting her down for her nap, and asked if she wanted to keep playing in her room.  Yes, she said.  I told her I was closing her door so the noise wouldn't bother Katie.  I settled into the glider with Katie, and of COURSE, just as her eyes got heavy, heard Gracie calling, "mama?  mama!  mama!"  I stage-whispered, "in a minute, Gracie!!!"  and as I got Katie into her crib a few minutes later, thought to myself, yes.  I will leave Gracie downstairs tomorrow at naptime like always, this was a tactical error.

I had NO IDEA.

I opened the door to G's room, and....poo.  EVERYWHERE.  Alllll over the floor.  See, because, the thing is, I FORGOT that when we put G in a bed, we put a childproof doorknob cover on the inside door knob, so she couldn't get up in the night and wander around looking for broken glass to eat or anvils to pull on top of her head.  So she had to go potty and she couldn't get out of her room.

Just let that sink in for a minute, how awesome I am.

I. Felt. AWFUL.  I kept saying, "I'm so sorry Gracie, I'm so sorry!!!"  which then led her to mimic me and say, "sowwy, mommy!!  Sowwy!"  so THEN I had to keep saying, "NO Gracie, don't be sorry!!!  it's okay!!!"  Then she said, "Mama, ees okay, I cleaned it up!"  And my eyes darted furiously around the room, and asked, "...wiiiiith what?"  "The diap-air!" (God I love how she says that word.)  Sure enough, we'd left an overnight dipe in her room, and she had used it to try to clean up a bit.  Which you know made me feel that much worse. 

Now the carpet is scrubbed clean and the childproof doorknob is off the door (we sold all our anvils) and seriously?  I would prefer to not repeat that little adventure.

And on a totally unrelated note, I need Halloween to be OVER already, because I cannot seem to stop eating candy, and aside from the fact that I am pretty sure I gained back every ounce of baby weight that I FINALLY lost (but don't know for sure because I cannot bring myself to check), I have a constant ice pick headache, upset stomach, and hideous mood swings.   So srsly. Why I can't just stop eating the damn candy is also beyond me, but since I CAN'T, I need the sugar out of the house.

Thursday, October 27, 2011

What is this, the Ritz???

"Gracie.  You HAVE to put underwear on before you eat lunch."

...

"GRACIE.  You don't have to wear pants, but you HAVE to wear underwear."

Tuesday, October 25, 2011

What? NO. just....no.

Eight months?????  I do not remember signing off on this.

Katie, on the other hand, is fully on board.

You guys, this kid.  OMG.  She is like a living, breathing ball of sunshine.  She is perpetually GIDDY about life in the world.

Especially when it involves cupcakes.
She learned a few new tricks this month.  She has always been crazy vocal, and FINALLY, we have consonant babbling.  She loves to practice and play around with pitch and volume and she's *pretty* sure she's saying something awfully important.  She's started throwing her hands in the air- but never when we ask how big she is.  Instead, she raises them above her head and looks at us expectantly, like, "Um, HELLO, waving my hands here, don't you have something to say?!"  And of course, the second I get the camera out, she's got her hands back in her lap like nothing ever happened.  Just tonight after dinner, I noticed her clasping her hands under her chin, like a little old lady. 

Oh yeah, and she did this, too:

and by "this", I mean, survived being dressed this way.
Her sleep seems to finally be getting back on track- the last few nights, she's only been up once, and she's actually learning how to take a nap, which is seriously nothing short of a miracle.  I really didn't think she'd EVER learn how to do that.  Of course, she'll get shots in a month and that'll all go to hell, but for now, I'll take it. 

She looooves to eat, and unlike her sister, this one is an omnivore.  Meatloaf, meat balls, sloppy joes, turkey and rice, you name it, she loves it.  

Oh yes, also bagels.
Her most favorite thing in the world, though, is still her big sister.  Grace walks into the room, and Katie's whole face lights up.  When Katie is crying and fussy and mad, Gracie can *instantly* make her laugh, just by sticking out her tongue and saying, "blablablablalbalba!!!"  (Um.  that's not doing it justice.  anyway.)  The feeling is moooostly mutual- if Katie's crying, Grace will say, "Ohhh, what happen-a Katie?!"  But then Katie will reach for one of her toys and it's all, "noooooo, KATIE."  So, I mean, they're normal, too. 

"Seriously Katie, if you wear those pants again, I WILL pretend I don't know you."


One of the games that seriously never gets old to me is the "X months ago at this very minute, ABC was happening" game.  I'm pretty sure I'm alone in that, heh.  ANYWAY, tonight we were all playing upstairs after tubbies, and when the clock ticked to 6:43, I said, "awww, eight months ago right now, I told my nurse I needed to push and she went to get dinner!"  Seven minutes later, I tickled Katie under her chin and smiled.  And maybe ten minutes after that, it was time for bed, and I was nursing her, all bundled up.  And I thought, wow.  Eight months ago right now, I was doing the exact same thing.

Oooh, hello, did someone say nursing?!
Happy eight months K-Mae.  It just keeps getting better and better:)

Sunday, October 16, 2011

Klumsy Kate

I've been saying for awhile that Grace isn't particularly accurately named.  The poor kid can trip on thin air.  Her sister appears to be following in her footsteps.

Katie's weekend, in summary:

While scooting around on the bathroom floor, she lunged forward on her knees, headfirst, into the corner of the tile wall in the bathroom, cracking her forehead right on the browbone, leaving a red mark.

While crawling around at my parents' house, she somehow wedged herself under one of their chairs.  Said chair is also a recliner, and Gracie chose that moment to open the chair, leaving a big scratch on the back of her head.

While exploring in the pull-out pantry in the kitchen, she lost her balance and slammed down, face first, onto the bottom shelf, leaving a big swollen cut smack in the middle of her philtrum.  (Sorry.  Her philtrum)

Considering her rapidly increasing mobility, I'm guessing we're going to have to invest in a set of football pads for her.  Because just a few days ago, she got herself stuck like this:

Of course I took a picture before I rescued her.  Mother of the Year!

Monday, October 10, 2011

I'm Not Above Bribery

So I'm just gonna cut to the chase here: Grace totally refuses to pee anywhere other than home/Grammy's house/Grandma and Pop-Pop's house.  ONE TIME, we went out to dinner and she peed three times on the potty.  Then someone came in and went in the next stall and she damn near lost her mind.  When the person started making noise, she shrieked, "GET ME OUT OF HERE!!!"  And there has been no public bathroom utilization since. 

Not for lack of trying.  Ohhhh, I have tried.  And you know what?  She's tried too.  Her teacher at the Y said that, at the second class, Grace told her she had to go potty.  They got to the bathroom and Grace looked around and said, "There's no frog (frog potty)!!" and refused to go.  We've made it to the bathroom at Target multiple times, only to have her completely freak and refuse to go- and I can't blame her, since the last time we were there, someone started using the hand dryer and oh my GOD, it sounded like a 747 was taking off in the bathroom.

So I've changed gears.  My new goal is to have her hold it til we can get home.  Sometimes, I will offer incentives to achieve this. 

Whatever it takes, people.  Whatever it takes. 

If only I could bribe Katie to sleep, I'd be golden.  Particularly since she seems to alternate between waking three times a night and waking for the day at ungodly times.  She has been known to sleep until 6 or 7, waking only once, but that only happens when she forgets to wake up.  And she's too little for popcorn, so I am stumped here.

Saturday, October 1, 2011

Add it to the list

As if it weren't bad enough when I started flagrantly disregarding allergy rules?

Today I let Katie eat tortilla chips off the floor.  At someone else's house.  And acknowledged she was doing it.  And when my friend offered to clean them up, I rolled my eyes and said, "Nah.  She's fine."

Dude.  I let her eat off the floor and didn't pretend to be horrified. 

(in my defense: I happen to know for a fact that the rug she was eating them off of was probably cleaner than any plate in my house.  if I'd wanted chips myself, I would have happily picked up a few and eaten them, too.)