Rosie Posie

She was a really nice kitty.


(also have to say that Stephen is a very nice boy. I mean, duh, but she was my cat and he took care of her, as I was freaking the fuck out and could not do it myself. The End.)

Sewer Cap of HATE

Picture it:

You had a baby three days ago. Said baby has slept for maybe five minutes since the minute she entered the world. I mean, roughly. Said baby is also kind of mean. I mean, I'm just being honest here.

It is December. In Chicago. There are 42 feet of snow on the ground, and it is colder than the summit of Mt. Everest (again, I mean, roughly).

You and your husband are taking your mean little baby to her first pediatrician visit. You walk your bleary-eyed, miserable self across the frozen tundra of the parking lot, when you encounter THIS:



It may not look like much, but the parking lot is dark (because there's covered parking there, not that you found a spot in that area, and anyway, the sun shines for all of three seconds each day in December, so it's dark to begin with), you can't really see it. And anyway, your feet are barely leaving the ground, because you're so tired you could vomit.

What will happen is, you'll catch your toe on the pure evil of that sewer cap, and you will stumble forward. Lunging. HARD.

Did I mention you had a baby three days earlier? Think of the stress that lunging puts on, well, your body, shall we say.

Oh. And by the way? All of this happens on your birthday.

Every single time I take Gracie back to the pediatrician, I stomp up and down on that sewer cap and tell it to go to hell. And if you know me at all, you know I'm not kidding.

Nine Months

What's longer, the nine months you're pregnant, or the first nine months of your baby's life? (TOTALLY the nine months of pregnancy. Except the first three months of G's life. Those were, um, special.)

I keep thinking nine months should be a bigger milestone, I guess because it's the same amount of time you spend pregnant? And up until today, it didn't really seem like it, but then we hit two big milestones.

The first one I miraculously caught on camera, because she happened to do it while we were already taking pictures. Look at this big girl!


This is especially surprising because Grace prefers to hold off on meeting milestones until juuuust before it becomes a red flag that she's not doing something.

The other milestone is not exactly voluntary on her part. I've kept up her habit of waking at 4am to snack and cuddle, because it used to mean she'd sleep til 6am. Ever since saturday, she has woken between 5:15 and 5:30. Hate that. With the heat of a thousand suns. But? If she's gonna wake up that early anyway, we are soooo done with that 4am feeding. Breaking that habit is gonna be a total bear, but if it's not getting mommy any more sleep than she'd get otherwise, then Gracie isn't getting any 4am visits from mommy. Because I'm mean like that.

Other than that, Gracie had her first dinner out, which was a great success, started feeding herself almost exclusively (and has such a good pincer grasp, she can grab stuff that I'm holding in a pincer grasp), and spent some time visiting my Loyola with my best friend from college and her son:



The part I'm sad about is her new status as a cart-rider. *sniff* She sure does love it, though:


(is there a new mom on earth who doesn't spend half her days at Target? Between all the stuff you need, and the times when you just want to get OUT OF THE HOUSE...)

It's been another great month. Can't wait to see what next month brings.

I Have A Question.

For all you moms of kids older than mine (and there aren't THAT many of you, but I know there are some who never comment and I'd really like it if you jumped in right now. You probably still won't. That's fine. whatever. sniff.).

The first time your precious, lovely child walked over to another child, or group of children, and attempted to join in the fun, and was thwarted, what on earth did you do? How did you handle it?

Because although that day is off in the distant future, the mere thought makes me want to vomit. Let's not even start talking about the first time another little girl is mean to her.

I work with a woman whose son doesn't go to the same preschool as most of the kids in the neighborhood, so when they go to the park, he's a bit of an outcast. Once, he actually walked back to her with his hands up and said, "Mommy, they won't let me play. Nobody wants to play with me?"

Could you die? I would DIE.

What on earth do you do???

Also, what kind of budding sociopath would look at this face and say, "Go away, I don't want to play with you!"?



(ok. no more gratuitous pictures, promise.)

*sniff*

We were out and about today and I remembered I needed something from Target (although I have banned myself from shopping there, we really did need a new shower curtain and bathmat, so I made an exception, and I was VERY well-behaved while I was there, for the record). I didn't have the front carrier with me, so I decided it was time to just let her be a big girl and ride in the cart.

Oh my.

She was in HEAVEN. She kept looking up at me with total surprise and grinning from ear to ear. I almost ran over, um, every single person in Target, because I coudln't stop staring at her happy face. Everyone who walked past us commented on how happy she was.

Don't get me wrong, it was so cute and so much fun, but...I guess this means she's done with the front carrier:( For someone who reeeally didn't think baby-wearing would be for her, I was AWFULLY attached to it. Back when she hated the world, it was sometimes the only thing that would calm her down. It was so cozy! But lately, she's been a bit antsier in the carrier, scooting around and just not so happy. I knew we were getting to the end of the line with it, but I was kind of ignoring that fact. Can't really ignore it anymore. She was way too happy. (although, for the record, she's still too little to ride in the cart at Costco, so, you know, we can wean slowly.)

At one point, she gave me a big, fat, smile, and spontaneously threw her hands in the air. It was adorable, but also? OK KID, I get it. You are so big.

Yeah, She's Always Been Like That.

I went out to dinner last night with Anne and our two kids. It was right around bedtime, and I was nervous, but of course, ma petite gourmande was easily fed into submission. She dined on bread dipped in garlic dressing, penne with meat sauce, and the veggies from my fettucine primavera- broccoli, asparagus, artichokes, mushrooms, and roasted red peppers. This kid, I am telling you.

The best part of the meal, though, was when a woman approached our table and said, "I cannot believe how GOOD she is! They're both so good!"

She said that! About my baby! MY BABY!

This baby:




She's come so far, I'm so proud of her:)

Real Mom of Genius

My friend Anne is visiting this weekend with her 16 month old son. While we were out, Gracie fell asleep in the stroller. She barely woke up when I moved her to the car. Sigh, I said, now she won't nap when I move her to the crib for SURE, she's been sleeping too long. Anne said, "Well. Um. If it were me? It's a gorgeous day. Sit in the car with her and read a book until she wakes up."

Why had this never occurred to me before? Why did I just sigh heavily and assume the rest of the afternoon would be filled with fussing and overtiredness and nap refusal?

Because I am smrt.

I sat in the front seat and read the sunday paper while G took a nice, long, motionless nap. All told, she probably slept two hours. That is an amazing afternoon nap for her. This has totally solved our afternoon nap problem!

It ALSO solves my ridiculous backlog of the New Yorker problem. Two birds, one stone. Awesome.