One of my favorite bloggers wrote a post full of random things she wants to remember about her daughters. Stuff she knows she'll forget. I am totally going to copy her, not because I lack creativity (although I do), but because oh my GOD, I cannot remember a damn thing these days. Also because, I can remember, with intricate details, some of the most upsettting, difficult, and sad moments of G's early days. Then, there were other moments, sweet ones or happy ones, when I would think to myself, remember this! Commit this to memory, this moment, right here. And while I remember *thinking* that, I can't remember a single damn thing I was trying to remember. Even with all that deliberate effort! Sigh. The brain, she is fried. To a crisp.
And I just HAVE to remember some of these things. Like last thursday, when the counter guys came and made all kinds of noise installing the counters and drilling holes for the faucets, and she napped through all of that. When she finally woke up, we went in the yard while they finished. It was a perfect day with a clear blue sky and lots of sunshine and a gentle breeze and just the right amount of humidity and she sat on my lap and peacefully nursed under a blanket*, and it could not have been more perfect. I want to remember that when she's seventeen and screeching that she hates me and she's NOT GOING TO COLLEGE so who CARES that she's failing remedial PE, GOD mom.
And I want to remember littler things, like the fact that every time she sneezes, she breaks out into the hugest grin you have EVER seen, or the way she smiles with her mouth wide open if you hang her upside down, or the way she eats the tightening strap in her carseat with such dedication every single time she's in the car, and even the fact that playing on a blanket in the backyard is an exercise in insanity because she absolutely INSISTS upon eating grass (which may or may not be covered in dog pee). Um. There's more. But that's what I can think of right now.
*Yes, I nurse under a blanket in my own backyard. Normally, I most certainly would not. However, there's the matter of the giant high school across the alley that looks directly into our backyard, and I have no need to go all National Geographic for a bunch of 15 year old punks.